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Monique Henderson, founder of Bright StepsBright StepsBehavior GPSBuilt by Monique — ADHD mom · Special Ed Teacher · IEP, BIP & FBA writer
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Turn 1 of 6 · Behavior GPS Sequence

🫁 Calm First

Regulate yourself before you regulate the child.

This classroom is the practice. You learn the move and try it at home. The Behavior Struggle Map is the separate paperwork — the filled-in logs, letters, and plan for the school. We do not repeat it here.

You stop yelling tonight, even when they push every button.

19 min0/3 lessons doneBadge: Calm Starter

What you walk away with

A 60-second reset you can do in the hallway before you speak.

Lesson 1 · 6 min

Why you yell (it is not because you are a bad parent)

FREE

Yelling is a body reaction, not a character flaw. Once you know the signal, you can catch it early.

  1. Step 1: Notice your first body sign — hot face, tight jaw, loud breath.
  2. Step 2: Name it out loud in your head: "My body is going up."
  3. Step 3: Put one hand on the wall or counter. That stops the pacing.
  4. Step 4: Wait for one full breath before any word leaves your mouth.

I Do

I show you the three body signs that come right before a yell.

We Do

We practice catching the sign in the live room using your real story from this week.

You Do

You catch it once tonight and post what your body did first.

This week: Write down your #1 body sign on a sticky note. Put it on the fridge.

Lesson 2 · 8 min

The 60-second reset

FREE

You cannot calm a child with a body that is still in the fight. This is the fastest way down.

  1. Step 1: Say "I need one minute." Walk 5 steps away.
  2. Step 2: Breathe in for 4, hold for 4, out for 6. Do it three times.
  3. Step 3: Drop your shoulders and unclench your jaw.
  4. Step 4: Pick ONE sentence to say when you walk back.
  5. Step 5: Walk back slow. Low voice. Get on their eye level.

Say this

  • "I need one minute. I am coming right back."
  • "I am not leaving you. I am getting calm so I can help."
  • "I am back. Let's start over."

I Do

I walk you through the reset on video so you hear the pace and the tone.

We Do

We do the breathing together at the start of every live call.

You Do

You run the reset one time tonight before you speak.

This week: Do the reset once, even on a good night, so your body learns it.

Lesson 3 · 5 min

Repair after you lose it

Members

The repair matters more than the mistake. This is how trust comes back.

  1. Step 1: Wait until you are actually calm. Not 30 seconds after.
  2. Step 2: Own your part only. Do not add "but you..."
  3. Step 3: Say what you will do next time.
  4. Step 4: Ask for one small thing to do together — snack, walk, book.

Say this

  • "I yelled. That was mine, not yours."
  • "Next time I am going to take my minute first."
  • "Can we start over together?"

I Do

I model a real repair, word for word.

We Do

We rewrite your repair sentence together so it fits your child's age.

You Do

You say it to your child and post how they answered.

This week: Say one repair sentence this week. Notice their face when you do.

Next turn

Turn 2: Spot the Clue

What happened right before the behavior?

Go to Turn 2

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